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Cats VS Date

Candys

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I have been divorced for 5 years. It was not a good parting of the ways. The husband was a certified narcissist amoung other things.

So I go on this date with a blues musician that I met back in the spring. He is from Canada, attractive, tall and talented. He had been to my house a month ago as a test. I had candles going on the back patio, music and incense. Oh - the cat slipped out - I say "have you seen a naked cat before?" he says "no I haven't". He says "how nice". I am thinking WTF - how nice? I see right away this guy is not into cats.

So on to our date. He shows up late at my house. I had made plans for us that included daylight hours. I had it all planned. But he was late. So when he does SHOW UP. I am with my Mom and son in the garden with the chickens free ranging. He does get out his guitar and plays for us. I then tell him that the plans have been changed because of his late arrival. (Of course he is not bothered by it). We spend some time on my back patio listening to more of his songs.

This is twice that I have been with this man and both times the conversation has been about him. He has never asked one thing about me nor has he ever made a comment about me like - "nice jeans" or "your hair is messed up". And then he wants to kiss and whatever.

I could not wait until he was gone. Then I could be with my Sphynx and my Mom, son and the Meezer, Cho-Latte. Whew. I hate dating. I am not here to fulill an ego.

I don't want to date ever again. Yuck.

OK - I got all of that out and feel better. Now I am going to spend some time with my cats.:BigSmile:
 

sydkat7

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Ugh, I don't envy your single status, Candys. You're better off without that dude! Musicians are the worst men to date...most of them are inconsiderate and irresponsible.

I went through all that dating crap for a few years after my divorce and most of the men I met were nacissistic self-absorbed weekend warrior wannabee jerks. Of the few I invited home, my cats didn't like any of them...that should have told me something right there. I dated a lot of guys but didn't find any that I or my cats could tolerate.

I think the love gods finally took pity on me when I met my current boyfriend. He's far from perfect but he's a keeper...he's not only very handsome, but he's sweet, thoughtful, and down to earth. My relationship with him has been the healthiest and longest-lasting one I've ever been in...we just celebrated our 9-year anniversary last month! Oddly enough, my cats seem to like him even though he's not a cat person.
 

marlene

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I was married for almost 19 years and have been happily divorced just shy of 12 years. I remember my very last date, 4 years ago. It was just after my heart/diabetes stuff happened and the fellow I'd been dating for a couple years took me out to dinner the weekend after I got un-hospitalized. I don't remember what I ordered for a main course but he protested when I said I wanted corn for my side dish. He told me I couldn't eat corn now that I was diabetic and raised his eyebrows in a disapproving way, which really ticked me off. Reminded me of how my parents had hovered over me for the previous few weeks and the last thing I wanted was someone else telling me what to do. It's weird how something so small made me chuck a relationship, but I couldn't get home fast enough and refused to ever see him again. Have never regretted it either.
 

TotenEngel

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My husband had never lived with cats before, he had experience with dogs but not kittys.
However, I am glad to say he is a man converted and knows his place in the pecking order of things (I have 4 male cats!) Lazarus, our black and white fur baby was my gift to him for his 30th and Smeagol (our nekkid baby) loves to sit on his shoulder while he works from home.
This is why I proposed to him - definatly a keeper! I won't tolerate men who don't love my cats, they come as part of the deal!!
 

Gullivers Keeper

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You will find someone to share you love if you want someone too :ThumbsUp: I've been married for 7 years now to a wonderful man who had 1 cat when I met him. We still have that one Black and White DSH, and also acquired together a tortie and 2 nakeds :BigSmile: Since the tortie he's said "This is the last one" :LOL::LOL::LOL::LOL: He's a good man!

Have faith, they are out there
 

tessblack

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Sorry your Canadian man was not a good one. There are a lot of nice ones from Canada, really, I promise. It is good that you got rid of him that is for sure. There are good men out there but also a ton of crappy ones too. Working on a race team with all men and mostly men in the series you see it all. There are so many D bags out there. But then there are a bunch of good ones that restore your faith. I feel so fortunate, with John Wayne, no matter what **** is happening he is there for me.
Don't give up faith because there are good people, it just gets harder as we get older.

If you ever head to Houston let me know. I had a friend that was from your area, I think he was from a little place near San Angelo called Tennyson.
 

AmazonGoddess

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Sorry you had a bad experience Candy. We really must stop shipping all the idiot male Canadians to the States. :Wink: :Laugh:

After a horrid marriage (in which I literally had to run away in the middle of the night), and then a serious of dates that didn't want to be anything but 'booty-calls' I finally found a good man. Yeah, he's got issues (he has a penis, he can't help it) but he loves me and he loves the 'kids' as much as I do. He still breaks down when we talk about Zekey.

Don't give up! There will be someone who appreciates you, and your kitties. :)
 

Candys

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Thanks everyone for your unique sense of humor. Made me laugh at what we go through as women. Thank God I am not lonely, desperate or needy. Next time I get asked out, I will say that I am in a relationship with a nekkid guy that I love to pieces.:LOL::LOL::LOL:
 

holly_savage

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Don't lose hope. There is someone out there for everyone.

Please don't judge all Canadian men against your example. LOL

And just remember, you usually get exactly what you asked for in a man...just make sure you ask for the right things to start with! lol
 

NightSpidy

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Candys, I say move on sistah! First off, any guy that shows up late and doesn't apologize, or acknowledge the plans that you made, or take the time to ask things about you and just wants to make out needs to be kicked to the curb - fast. I'd say to him, "don't let the door hit you on your @ss on the way out". Plus, if you're having feelings that you couldn't wait until he was gone, that is a good sign he's not right for you. Don't give up, there are good guys out there :)
 
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I've been married almost 2 years now. When we got together we each had one cat. (we each had an orange tabby, they are both now 16 years old)

Then for a wedding present he bought me Alice, my nekkid soul mate who came home with me from our honeymoon.

Then a few months later we rescued little blind Sayuri from a shelter that wanted to put her down because she's blind.

Then nearly a year after getting Alice, we rescued Dita from a home where she was kept locked in a closet and bathed only once a month.

We now have 5 kitties, and even though he acts like he doesn't care. I know that he's just trying to be manly because first thing he does when he gets home is grab Alice and give her kisses and then lay on the bed to be ambushed my cat children. :LOL:
 

MissMySphynxBoys

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Well Candys, after hearing that you already married a certified narcissist once, I'm glad you didn't fall into the same trap again. Musicians and artists can make for a fun romp but they are frequently tormented and needy. Just like Sphynx, if you are patient and keep looking you will find the right guy. I highly recommend D&D playing-scientist-IT-nerds. :Wink:
 

ckutkuhn7

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Candys, I say move on sistah! First off, any guy that shows up late and doesn't apologize, or acknowledge the plans that you made, or take the time to ask things about you and just wants to make out needs to be kicked to the curb - fast. I'd say to him, "don't let the door hit you on your @ss on the way out". Plus, if you're having feelings that you couldn't wait until he was gone, that is a good sign he's not right for you. Don't give up, there are good guys out there :)

I'll second that opinion! Couldn't say it better myself.
I've been known to just up right and leave during a date. Excuse myself from the table and never looked back!! lol

I'm so gald I've found a good man and totally by accident. I think we all seem to find someone when we quit looking.
 

TotenEngel

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OMG, so many good points I agree with!!lol
we've just got home from 2 days away and the firt thing we both did is lie on the bed for the kitty ambush, and yes, my husband is a d and d playing IT geek type who I met after i had given up looking!!!! lol
 

NightSpidy

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I think we all seem to find someone when we quit looking.

Yes, I agree. I had been looking for over a year and finally after too many pathetic dates and disgusting pig-headed men :Angry: , I told my family and friends I had given up on men, I was done, and going solo. At the same time, my hubby-to-be had told everyone he was done with women.

Next thing I know, my dear cousin, the match-maker, put us two geeks together and I knew within two weeks of meeting him, he was "the one" and I was gonna marry him. :Adore: 6 months later we were engaged in Mexico on the beach. :ThumbsUp: And the BEST thing, my MOM LOVES HIM!!!!! LOVES HIM!!! She has never liked any guy I have dated, but the first time she met him, she told me he was right for me.
 

ypvsypvs

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I have to bring Swedish former race drivers, sci-fi/horror-geeks, cat maniacs into light here as well.
They are great.
And availible for international transport, preferably not in carrier though.
Good lines, no HCM, worms or extra nipples.
 

susi794

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I have to bring Swedish former race drivers, sci-fi/horror-geeks, cat maniacs into light here as well.
They are great.
And availible for international transport, preferably not in carrier though.
Good lines, no HCM, worms or extra nipples.

Hmmmmmm...sounds pretty good. Do you have any older, fatter brothers?:Wink:
 

Gizzymom

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Hmmmmmm...sounds pretty good. Do you have any older, fatter brothers?:Wink:

LOLOLOLOLOL

:LOL::LOL::LOL::LOL::LOL:

Why do they have to be older and fatter?? You could start be a cougar, Susi!!!
Rawrrrrrr....:Hysterical:

Then again.... you have to train younger men... and sometimes older ones too.... I'm sure you've done plenty of that with your babies!!!:LOL:
 
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