Guilt?

[abbyknitter]

Well I am almost sure I'm getting another sphynx (almost as in if dad says yes--) and I am really excited about it....but I can't help feeling guilty. It almost feels like I am cheating on Abby---I know it's silly but I can't help but feel that way. Even though I think it's best for her and I know it's going to have to happen sooner or later. Once I'm done with school and move out shes going to need a friend anyway--right? So why am I feeling this way?

 

[susi794]

There will be enough love to go around....that's how love is.

 

[abbyknitter]

Susi you are just so sweet Thanks so much

 

[TotenEngel]

We have 4 boys in our house and they all have their special time and special places and are all loved equally, just for slightly different reasons!
What does worry me was your line about once you finish school and move out?? What happens to your baby(s) then?? Surely they go with you?

 

[Gizzymom]

I felt the same way about Gizmo... And guilt won... He is an only child... and we both love it that way...

My only advice is I think sooner is better than later. The more the two of you bond, the more difficult it will be to add another family member. And I believe the younger the cat, the more accepting he is of a friend.... Just my opinion though.

 

[Bella07]

There will be enough love to go around....that's how love is.

I wholeheartedly agree!

What does worry me was your line about once you finish school and move out?? What happens to your baby(s) then?? Surely they go with you?

I was thinking the same thing as TotenEngel. I'm not sure what level of school you are currently in; (High School/Undergrad/Grad/ or so forth?!) If you plan to live in a dorm room, pets are not allowed there, whatsoever! But, if you are moving into an apartment, well then, problem solved. Just find a pet friendly one.

Just be sure that you are 100% sure that you will be able to bring both Abby and your new kitten along with you once your leave your parents home. Unless of course if your parents are willing to keep both kitties for you.

I own 5 animals, including 2 cats. There is always enough love to go around for each and every one! You'll see, there is no need to feel guilty. They are my babies, and I love them all to death. Well, Best of Luck!

 

[abbyknitter]

We have 4 boys in our house and they all have their special time and special places and are all loved equally, just for slightly different reasons!
What does worry me was your line about once you finish school and move out?? What happens to your baby(s) then?? Surely they go with you?

Yeah I go to the local technical college and i am living with my dad until i'm done (who know how long that will take lol). But what I meant was I am definetly taking Abby with me and she is used to being around other animals and people so when we move I can't have her alone everytime i leave the house. So she will need a bald friend sooner or later.
Yeah I have to bring Abby with me, I don't know what I would do with out her

 

[Mews2much]

Do not feel guilty I have 7 cats and they all love me.
The sphynx are best friends and all the sphynx love my Meeko for some reason.
The only problem is the boy picks on the girls.

 

[Bella07]

Yes, always lots of love to go around! But, not all boys pick on girls. My persian boy used to be the "peace maker" between my two female cats, and they all loved him dearly. He was their "dad" in a sense, because they always looked up to him and followed what he did!

 

[klreese]

It might be a tough transition for her but i noticed when we brought a new kitty in our home our existing kitty was SOOO excited and curious (with both introductions-2 new cats). I noticed, however, that the new kitty was actually the one that was the most nervous and had the toughest time transitioning. I would anticipate her being pretty open to the idea. Just make sure she gets lots of snuggles.
No need to feel guilty, the new kitty will be a wonderful addition to your family!!

 

[abbyknitter]

Thanks everyone!I feel much better

 

[NakedNinja]

That's funny! Our Tonkinese, Tigger, is the "enforcer" around here. If anyone is doing something they shouldn't, he bats them and tells them off. That includes us! On Gabe's bath days, Tig is always at my feet, batting and telling me to leave his brother alone. He "guards" the door when we have visitors, making sure we are safe. Sweet man.

ETA: Tig is 10 years old. We just took in a Maine Coon "rescue" boy who is around 2, and they've become the best of friends. Your new kitty and your little lady will work it out.

 

[TotenEngel]

OK, I freaked a bit cos the way you phrased it made it sound like you'd be leaving her somewhere! Sorry!

I've mainly had rescue cats so introduced cats to each other at anything from 12 weeks to 8 years old and they do all deal with it in diffrent ways! Laz is our youngest (next to Smeagol) and I thought he would love to have a little friend to play with (part of the reason I went for a kitten this time) However, he really isn't sure about him at all! Just this evening Laz was curled up on a cushion and Smeagol sat next to him to try and curl up and Laz got up and walked away, leaving poor Smeagol flailing on his back where he'd fallen over! Yet Red, our 12 year old is always curled up asleep with him!

 

[abbyknitter]

It's alright but I could never ever leave my baby. I would sooner die.

 

[kaoticharmony]

We had 5 cats when we got this little short haired flame tip named Anastasia. I'll never forget her first Christmas she stole everybodies (even ours) toys...lol! She was about 2 when we got our Sphynx, ShivaDancing Shiva was very friendly. The cats said he tasted funny.
To say Ana was upset was an understatement. If I hadn't seen this I never would have believed it... My room mate, Alice picked her up and had her near her face (hold in mind this is a tiny 6 lb cat) she kissed her and said "what's the matter is Ana jealous?" It was amazing... this paw shot out and hit Alice right in the eye! She hit her so hard that Alice fell on the bed and had a black eye! Yes, Anastasia was our little princess and YES!! SHE WAS UPSET!!
It took her a few days and lots of extra attention but she got over it.
Seven years later our lives changed. Alice discovered she had breast cancer. Six months later she was gone. I ended up selling the house and moved a few states away. I had lived here about 2 years and decided I wanted another Sphynx. I looked on line and found this little male that I fell in love with. The breeder said she only had the picture up for 30 minutes! She offered me a deal on 2 (personally I like getting 2 kittens. It tends to take some of the stress off my existing adults). The picture has their nicknames on it. This is Neon Shadow Cat "Fleshy" My little boy and this is his sister Venus Bela Star "Lalena" The third kitten, Kaotic Harmony passed away. She was a frail baby (with a very sad story) that I tried real hard to save. I'll save her story for another post.
How did my household react? Most of the kids (my cats) were fine about it...aside from my 2 babies. Shiva and Anastasia were upset.
I did alot of extra things to make the introductions as easy as possible, but when bedtime rolled around................
Anastasia layed on the other side of the room and staired at me. Shiva (who always sleeps next to my head) went to the bottom of my bed and turned his back to me. It took an hour and lots of treats and offers to get him to come to me. The kittens made themselves right at home in the middle of my king-sized bed. I woke up in the middle of the night sweating and overheated... all 3 of them had crawled under the blankets with me and had cuddled up to my chest.
The next night Kuma decided she would be mom and started caring for them. Kuma is a very permissive parent and let them do whatever they wanted. ~She is 18 years old and currently training Venus to take her place as Queen someday~ On day 3 I woke up and found not just Kuma, but Shiva was with them two...they now had a dad as well. Shiva balances out Kuma and is a very stern father.
It took Ana a week or so (and I didn't get a black eye) and she discovered that they would play with her. I would say within a month things were back to normal. Kuma and Shiva still take care of their kids. Neon LOVES Kuma's fur. He likes to bury his head in her side and belly....she's so soft and warm!
Good-Luck and I would start looking. The sooner the better. Honestly I think it will be better for Abby. Moving is a big deal to a cat. Not only will her enviroment change... her human family will change too. Having an established friend will help her and keep her company. Not to mention you will have your hands full with being on your own.

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