Welcome to Sphynxlair! Connect with Sphynx owners & enthusiasts around the world!

I don't remember asking your opinion...

lawgrl

Lairian
Joined
Aug 13, 2010
Messages
98
Points
34
What is it, exactly, that makes people think that their unsolicited (and rude) opinions about the number of pets somebody else owns is actually welcome?!

The most recent purveyors of unsolicitied rudeness about our menagerie are my in-laws (big surprise there, right:LOL:). We were having dinner with my husband's family earlier this week when, out of the blue, my MIL turns to him and says (in a rude and snarky tone) "So, exactly how many cats do you have now?" :Angry:

Wanting to nip this in the bud (nothing in that tone from his family ever ends without me being totally irate at them) I "helpfully" reply (in the most dismissive tone possible) "Ummmm, three. We have three. We've had three for months now. Hasn't changed."

Well, that doesn't do the trick and she starts in about three being soooo many and you know what will happen if we get more (I'm thinking to myself "um, no I'm not really sure...what will happen? will the sun explode? will the earth reverse it's rotation?")...:Angry::Angry:

I don't think my typing can adequately convey the rudeness of this exchange, so you'll just have to take my word that it was rude and extremely annoying...and she thought it was perfectly acceptable!:Dizzy:

First of all, what business is it of theirs or anyone else's how many pets we have?! Second, why do people feel the need to comment on the number (almost always to say that it's "too many")?! Third, since when did 3 cats make you a hoarder?! Fourth, they can just plain suck it if I want to get a 4th cat...I take good care of my pets, our house is plenty big for them all, and we don't have kids.

But I realized that she's not the only one to comment on number of pets. When I was single and wanted to get a second sphynx (making a grand total of 2 pets in my house), too many people to count made some comment or other about 2 cats being too many and guys not wanting a girl with too many cats (ugh. I can't even begin to go into how much this one annoyed me!). What is it that makes people feel the need to comment on the number of pets someone else has? I don't get it.
 
Joined
Jun 27, 2010
Messages
537
Points
0
Wow, that's just lame. I had 2 cats when I met my husband, and then he bought me ALice, and then I got Sayuri. And then Dita came home, and people say the same thing to me.

Ignore them, people are lame.
 

Candys

V.I.P Lairian
V.I.P Lairian
Joined
Jun 9, 2010
Messages
1,703
Points
238
I prefer pets over people any day. I am a hoarder of three felines and dream about two more Sphynx sweethearts. We need a really good come-back for this one. One that will BLOW THEIR MINDS. :LOL::LOL::LOL:
 

ypvsypvs

Senior Lairian
Senior Lairian
Joined
Oct 16, 2010
Messages
508
Points
0
Like three kids instead of three cats would make life easier. That noone says anything about.

And I would rather date a girl with three cats than three kids by the way. I could do that too if everything was good but I would think helluva lot more about it than if she had three cats, that's for sure.
 

Gullivers Keeper

Senior Lairian
Senior Lairian
Joined
Sep 15, 2009
Messages
495
Points
123
I'm not sure, I do always joke that as long as I'm married I can't really be the "crazy cat lady" :LOL::LOL::LOL: We have 4 and yes we sure do get the same reactions and I don't get it :Angry:
 

tessblack

Banned
Joined
Sep 18, 2009
Messages
1,401
Points
0
Yes I think the animal Hoarders DVD would be perfect. So true about the three cats over kids. It is ok to have lots of kids. no one ever calls then the crazy baby lady. Everyone enjoys something and it is no ones business unless the cats are not being taken care of or there is 50 of them. People just have to say **** to make themselves feel better I think. I would like to have another but I feel it would take away from these guys.
 

ktate88

Banned
Joined
Aug 25, 2010
Messages
695
Points
0
I hate when people do that! Because 3 is soooo many to feed and care for. I, too, would prefer 3 cats to 3 kids any day, well at this point in my life.

My boyfriend he didn't like the idea of having 2 cats in a house. I thought to myself, well I'd prefer to not have a snake but you know I'd get over it. Niles would love a friend!

This also brings me to the point that how many is too many as a single girl? I'd say no more than 2 or 3, but only because I don't want that crazy cat lady label. I have a feeling my relationship will be ending soon(long distance is hard!!) so this is something to consider.

Plus, Niles comes first with any future prospects. If they can't get over him then well then we do not need to go any further. Oh-- and he must be okay with animals in the bed.
 

JacksMom

Banned
Joined
Sep 14, 2010
Messages
438
Points
0
Wow, that IS so rude! I used to have three furry cats and 2 dogs, and nobody ever said anything to me about it! I can't imagine what I would say to them if I got cynical attitudes like that! Fortunately, all of my family are major pet lovers, both mom and dad's side, and they tell me Jack needs a friend. Right now, though, I like it just being Jack and me, but I am pretty sure in the future, I very well may add another, because I want another sooooo bad, but really like our vibe as 2 right now. :Smile:
 

ypvsypvs

Senior Lairian
Senior Lairian
Joined
Oct 16, 2010
Messages
508
Points
0
Oh-- and he must be okay with animals in the bed.
Don't think that will be a problem. Us guys love animals in the bed.
There are some who don't like cats in the bed though.
:Laugh:


I've always had 2-5 cats, single or not and never had much problems with it. Everyone know that it's always been a huge interest for me since I was a kid second only to motorcycle racing and stunting. Now when that part is gone ppl understand it even more.
Must have good family/friends because noone ever said anything bad about it more than to fool around. That I get a bit now since I got sphynxes and filled up bathroom with baby wipes and what have you hehe.
And as a guy it is never a problem saying you love cats when it comes to dating, except with allergics ofc.
 

marlene

V.I.P Lairian
V.I.P Lairian
Joined
May 14, 2010
Messages
1,985
Points
0
I've had a lot more than 3 cats at stages in my life (well, most of my adult life TBH) but no one in my family would dream of telling me I had too many. But now my mom keeps telling me I need to get another kitty cause she thinks Pedda is lonely being by herself. I keep telling her we're working on it!
 

laurame

Senior Lairian
Senior Lairian
Joined
Aug 3, 2010
Messages
380
Points
93
My question is why do those people have that show 18 Kids and Counting?? Wouldn't that be considered a hoarding show??? I'm just saying???

My family calls me a hoarder all the time. I go home and cry and then say f*** them all. My animals all get the care they need and are very healthy. Hoarder my sweet bum!!! I think I may get a t-shirt with that saying. What do you all think?
 

SphynxBaby

Lairian
Joined
Oct 6, 2010
Messages
8
Points
14
As long as you are taking care of your pets people should mind their own business! Not everyone that has an animal is a hoarder. Pets are like children to us, you don't see people asking how many kids do you have and then make rude comments or looks at you.
 

havingalook

V.I.P Lairian
V.I.P Lairian
Joined
Mar 30, 2009
Messages
1,280
Points
163
I must be the worst kind of hoarder, I have 5 kids plus my cats :LOL:

I think in general, its a mother-in-laws job to be judgmental on anything you chose to do *generalization*. Ignore her and give her a framed photo of you and your cats for Christmas, titled "To Grandma, love from your grandbabies" LOL
 

TotenEngel

Banned
Joined
Oct 18, 2010
Messages
846
Points
0
lol, while my mother in law is incredibly cool on almost every level, she doesn't really 'get' the cat thing, but she would never be mean about it!
We've bought her a really nice art deco picture frame for xmas and have actually put a pic of Smeagol in it, know thats not the pic she'll keep in it, but know she'll find it amusing!!!
 

klreese

V.I.P Lairian
V.I.P Lairian
Joined
Apr 26, 2010
Messages
1,029
Points
188
UGH!!! some people are such A-HOLES!!!(ESP in-laws ;)
 

Sleepyheadkitten

Senior Lairian
Senior Lairian
Joined
Jan 14, 2010
Messages
721
Points
0
Please, ya'll obviously either have no kids if you think anyone keeps their mouth shut about human babies anymore then they do pet babies ;) They don't. People are rude. They are nasty. People who cut you down about the number of cats in your house are the same people who will cut you down over other stupid things.

Unfortunately, that's life :( I honestly just say, "I lost count" when people ask- or a really really large number. It's none of their business! Only mine, my family, and my vet's! (And really- I don't know the count off the top of my head).

But I can say- I'm way over double the three in the first post ;)
 

lawgrl

Lairian
Joined
Aug 13, 2010
Messages
98
Points
34
The part that really gets me about their comments is that hubby's family are all some of the least responsible pet/animal owners I've ever met (the stories would make your blood pressure rise, although nothing that rises to abusive levels-otherwise I would have had to coordinate a "liberation, " lol)...so, I think it may be a passive aggressive thing.

Also, It's just one of those comments that gets under my skin (especially the whole "you'll never get a man with two cats" thing...ugh, really?! Not only does that not make any sense but maybe I didn't want a man if he didn't like pets and lots of them!!!)...I feel like it's so judgmental, for no particular reason other than people's individual notions of what an "acceptable" number of pets is (I really dislike it when people project their internal, subjective standards on other people...so rude.). If 3 or 4 or 7 cats is right for someone and they take good care of them (and my babies are spoiled!), then who is anybody else to say it's too many?!

I usually do a good job of completely ignoring them but she caught me on a bad week (and a sensitive subject...nobody messes with my babies!!!)...I'm feeling a little under the weather, which always seems to make me irritable, lol! Thanks everybody for making me feel better!
 

maxtmill

Senior Lairian
Senior Lairian
Joined
Mar 14, 2010
Messages
521
Points
88
I have had MANY comments from people - first, because I adopted 4 human children & gave birth to 2. Now they are all grown up into great people, & now those very same children have called me a hoarder more than once!!! We have 10 dogs, 5 cats (soon to be 6), & 5 fish tanks (soon to be downsized to 3). All are very much loved & taken care of. I mentioned on another cat forum that all of our animals seem to have been sent to us for some reason - God is good! We have wonderfully sweet animals! Our only problem is trying to keep the house clean!!:Dizzy:
 

sphynxie

V.I.P Lairian
V.I.P Lairian
Joined
Sep 16, 2010
Messages
1,673
Points
0
In laws are a*******! Mine take the cake with threatening phone calls and mommydearest conversations when hubby goes to the bathroom-PSYCHO!!!! I like Gizzymoms suggestion about the hoarding DVD and maybe combine that with a picture of the cats and photoshop in about 20 more :LOL::LOL::LOL:
 

abbyknitter

Senior Lairian
Senior Lairian
Joined
Dec 9, 2009
Messages
529
Points
0
How rude of them! But I know what you mean, before I got Abby I was looking at paying full price for a sphynx. I was only 17 at the time and my boyfriends parents started lecturing me about saving up my money for an $800 cat and how irrisponsible it was. I was thinking I don't even live with you people, why is this any of your business? Some people just don't understand how awsome cats are. And what are you spos to feel bad because you have three cats that you love and carefor? Skrewz inlaws and their hateful selves!
 
Top