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New donskoy kitten, need some advice on how to soothe him

SaltyMommies

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Mar 21, 2024
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Hi everyone,
I brought my (first) kitten home Friday night. He's adorable and sweet, 13 weeks old. He has already improved some but he has been really shocked and sad about missing his siblings and mom. The first night he was inconsolable and neither of us slept for more than an hour total. Last night he did sleep for a while and then woke up to cry for four hours straight from 4-8am.

When he's crying I make sure he has food and I stay with him and hold him when he lets me (although sometimes he just won't be comforted). He's been interested in playing but eventually he decides he's too stressed and starts to scream for his mom and look for her behind the furniture.

I know that he's small and adjusting, so I am asking for two things:

1. Some perspective that it's going to be ok and he's not too traumatized by leaving his breeder to ever be happy with me :(

2. Any tips on what worked to soothe your babies? I am concerned because I have work tomorrow, but I'll only be gone for 2-3 hours. But right now he can't seem to tolerate 5 minutes on his own and I have no idea how to help him. And I am concerned that we're both up all night because of the crying.

Thank you!
 

Catzzzmeow

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It is so stressful….my go to in order to soothe them, bond with them and assure them is throwing a soft blanket in the dryer and swaddle them in it. Wrap it tightly around them and do it consistently every night when you are settling in. Make a new routine for them to look forward to and they should settle down. Cats love routine behaviors @SaltyMommies
 

Yoda mom

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@SaltyMommies , welcoming you and your baby to the lair family. happy gotcha! what is your babies name?
all paw are family. it's a big new world for him and surely he misses mum n siblings. you are not alone. we are here for you. love time and patience, he will bond closely with you. hang in there! surely in no time we will see him bonded with you .

suggestion when you leave tomorrow or going out other times, I would suggest a** kitty safe room, no free roaming. I tend to do slow introductions to the house from the "kitty room: and go at his comfort level. I used a spare bathroom with a litter box, cat tree, food water and blankies ( toilet lid down , can use a childlock, and soap and razor blades put away). for my girl she used a spare bedroom as a kitty safe room, kitty proofed everything in it.

My batman stayed in the bathroom for over a week, would only peek out the door (he was an adult adoptee).
I let him peek out didnt force him. I left thee door open for his own comfort level to wander supervised. I closed all the doors to the other rooms, built up time and distance. you would never know he is the same shy boy. he is the most chatty velcro wild child.

kitty proof everything, plants, cords, even cat toys. when you leave tomorrow perhaps a throw blanket heated in the dryer when you leave. with my newbies I always slow blink at them, supposedly comforting .
members with kittens will surely chime in with suggestions. hugs n head smooches.

@Sheldon13 , @babymeow and all
 
Last edited:

SaltyMommies

Lairian
Joined
Mar 21, 2024
Messages
4
Points
4
It is so stressful….my go to in order to soothe them, bond with them and assure them is throwing a soft blanket in the dryer and swaddle them in it. Wrap it tightly around them and do it consistently every night when you are settling in. Make a new routine for them to look forward to and they should settle down. Cats love routine behaviors @SaltyMommies
Thank you so much! We'll try that tonight
 

SaltyMommies

Lairian
Joined
Mar 21, 2024
Messages
4
Points
4
@SaltyMommies , welcoming you and your baby to the lair family. happy gotcha! what is your babies name?
all paw are family. it's a big new world for him and surely he misses mum n siblings. you are not alone. we are here for you. love time and patience, he will bond closely with you. hang in there! surely in no time we will see him bonded with you .

suggestion when you leave tomorrow or going out other times, I would suggest a** kitty safe room, no free roaming. I tend to do slow introductions to the house from the "kitty room: and go at his comfort level. I used a spare bathroom with a litter box, cat tree, food water and blankies ( toilet lid down , can use a childlock, and soap and razor blades put away). for my girl she used a spare bedroom as a kitty safe room, kitty proofed everything in it.

My batman stayed in the bathroom for over a week, would only peek out the door (he was an adult adoptee).
I let him peek out didnt force him. I left thee door open for his own comfort level to wander supervised. I closed all the doors to the other rooms, built up time and distance. you would never know he is the same shy boy. he is the most chatty velcro wild child.

kitty proof everything, plants, cords, even cat toys. when you leave tomorrow perhaps a throw blanket heated in the dryer when you leave. with my newbies I always slow blink at them, supposedly comforting .
members with kittens will surely chime in with suggestions. hugs n head smooches.

@Sheldon13 , @babymeow and all
Thank you! His name is Todd
 

babymeow

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Awww when I first got Nabi (12 weeks old) she bonded with me right away but the first couple of days she would occasionally meow looking for her mom. Catzzzmeow and Yoda mom both gave wonderful advice. I did notice my kitty would only explore new places with me and got braver and braver so as Yoda mom suggested maybe start out with smaller spaces. My place is not very big but it still took her time to get used to exploring and she would just stay on my bed and sleep while I was at work (I kept checking on her from video cam). I think once he is comfortable and used to his new home he will definitely be inseparable from you as he is missing his old home and mommy. So give him lots and lots of love {=!
 

nudebea

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Hello and welcome to you and little Todd. You have already had some great advice, give him time , go at his pace. He is just getting used to a big new world. Good luck, Im sure everything will be alright
 

SaltyMommies

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Mar 21, 2024
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The warmed blanket is a wonderful idea but the only problem is sometimes when he's really worked up he doesn't want to be swaddled and it seems counterproductive to force it?

I had a friend over who has had cats her whole life. She was delighted with him and how at ease he was. She said it was a great sign that he was playful and showing his belly and purring a whole lot every time he was touched.

Last night he mostly slept! There was maybe an hour that was tricky. He pooped in his litter box and was wandering around the room crying, so I went to find him. He was hiding because so far when he poops I inspect him and give him a little wipe down with cat wipes and he hates them because they're cold and wet. So I have a baby wipe warmer that should be arriving today and hopefully that will be less shocking.

The only down side is I was so exhausted that once I finally was allowed to sleep I overslept and was late to work! But he was curled up next to me and it was the sweetest thing. I'm cautiously optimistic about tonight.
 

Yoda mom

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@SaltyMommies , awh, I can just see baby Todd cuddling with you.. he will be so bonded to you before you know it! great he slept most of the night !
I totally agree with your friends observations! oh, I forgot about those baby wipe warmers! you are a great mum! hugs n head smooches, Look foward to pics of baby Todd! love his name!
 
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