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Worst Mom Ever!

Gullivers Keeper

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Ok let me rephrase, I cannot afford to get evicted, there are not very many pet friendly landlords around here. Jack is going down to get his HCM screening this week. He has already had many tests done on his heart. I have spent well around 1k or more on him in the past year at the vet. I just picked up his records to take with me this afternoon. The only reason he hasn't had it sooner is because we did a test that showed he was not in active heart failure so they wanted to wait until he got rid of his URI and got to 1 year of age. I have to go out of STATE to get it done. We go down on Friday and I come back on Sunday. He also has had many xrays on his heart and it shows it to be enlarged and enlongated.

ETA: I am offended at the thought that I have ever let my pets suffer. I just spent around 600 on my dog to have surgery.

Ok that makes more sense, but I still do believe that there is no need to get a cat if you can not accept that they may scratch the house up - just my opinion, everyone has their own.
 

marlene

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I can tell you who is the worst mom - it is ME. I thought my lovely Sphynx - Kika was in Mom's room. I was drinking a couple too many glasses of wine watching TV and I heard a truck go by and heard a big THUMP!!!!! I thought to myself my heavens that sound like that truck hit an animal. I went to bed and awoke to my 9 year old son yealing Mom - there is a cat in the road and it looks like Kika. I ran out to see the cold and stiff body of my beloved Sphynx cat that had the most beautiful blue eyes. I BROKE.

Candys, I'm so very very sorry about Kika. I can't even begin to imagine how you feel. But what happened doesn't make you a bad mommy - it makes you the victim of a horrific unfortunate ACCIDENT. That could happen to anyone here, even me - and I'm the most paranoid person in the world about training my kitties to stay away from doors. Accidents happen, they don't make you a bad owner. I'm so sorry it happened to you.

As for the scratching up furniture... my home is what it is. My place isn't fancy my emphasis is on the family inside, not the structure or belongings. And that family includes my pets. If I had to worry about damage then I wouldn't have animals inside. I personally can't bear the thought of causing pain to a warm loving creature just because I'm unwilling or unable to invest the time and effort in training them regarding acceptable behaviors.

See, it's a matter of deciding what was more important to me. And the house falls pretty low on the list when compared to my family. Animals aren't malicious but they can cause damage, just like children do. I may be weird but I consider my pets to be my children and treat them accordingly.

Luckily I own my own home and can do what I damn well please. And though I do deplore declawing, I also deplore kitties being tossed outside or taken to a shelter or pts because they haven't been trained.
 

Gullivers Keeper

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See, it's a matter of deciding what was more important to me. And the house falls pretty low on the list when compared to my family. Animals aren't malicious but they can cause damage, just like children do. I may be weird but I consider my pets to be my children and treat them accordingly.

Luckily I own my own home and can do what I damn well please. And though I do deplore declawing, I also deplore kitties being tossed outside or taken to a shelter or pts because they haven't been trained.


I agree, in a perfect world nether would happen, but in a perfect world people would prepare for what is going to happen before they have children or pets, decide if they can handle it, then make a decision. Then we wouldn't have to worry about abused pets and children and there wouldn't be so many up for adoption.

Also you should spay an neuter your pets, and maybe some of your friends an relatives :LOL:
 

AmazonGoddess

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Candys ... I am so, so sorry. No, you are not a Bad Mommy. You're the victim of a horrible, horrible accident. I'm so sorry you and your son have to go through this. My heart goes out to you ...
 

Candys

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Thanks everyone. I was feeling low and vulnerable that day. I try not to think about it - but when I do I feel the stab in my heart. Thank Heavens I have Dinka to love on.
 
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Candys, I cannot imagine. I broke into tears when I read that. Thank you for sharing. Please do not let the guilt consume you. You are a good momma!

JacksMom, At one time, I was not aware of what takes place with declawing and said if I ever got a cat, I would have it declawed. I just happened to find out prior to getting my cats. Thank you for sharing. None of us are perfect and we have all done things that upon retrospect we wish we had not have.
 

sydkat7

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Candys, what happened to your Kika is terrible but it was not your fault. I used to very stupidly let my very first Siamese cat India go outside at night because that's what everybody in my family did with their cats. Well, one night India went outside and never came back. I looked for her all over Phoenix (where I was living at the time) and its surrounding suburbs for weeks and weeks before I had to give up the search. I felt SO guilty about letting her go outside for many, many years after I lost her. Was I ignorant for letting my cat go outside?....yes! Was I at fault for her disappearing?....not directly, as I loved her and only wanted what was best for her..I just didn't know any better at the time. But nowadays I know better...I don't let ANY of my cats go outside EVER, unless they are very closely supervised by me.
 
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NightSpidy

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I guess I am a little late responding but I just joined today and I'd like to throw my thoughts out there too. First off, Candys, :Cry: OMG how horrible!!! You are not a bad mom, it was a terrible, terrible accident. In fact, I don't think anyone on here is a bad mom....bad mom's don't come on forums to seek out information for their babes - they don't care.

As for the declawing, everyone has their right to choose and that is that. One thing I will say to Jack's Mom - what a crappy vet. I think it is the vet's responsibility to ensure the owner is making an informed decision, something he/she obviously did not do. Get a new vet. Simple. You wouldn't get a procedure done, especially a surgical one, without your doctor fully explaining everything would you? Ensure Jack has the same. I think you have learned from this choice and yes "poor Jack", but I think he is going to be just fine, there are far worse things than declawing that could have been done to him.

I ended up getting our DSH, Dexter, declawed earlier this year and it was not an easy choice for me to do, but necessary if he was to continue living in our home. He was born out of a mother, "Boots", that my Mom rescued from the streets and was the sole survivor of his litter. Boots had some feral-like traits that passed onto him that no amount of socializing could get rid of. He has the personality of a cantankerous, crotchety old man. That's not to say he isn't sweet, but more often he is not a very nice cat. Touching his belly has left scars on my hands and arms from him scratching me. He was a big scratcher - he would scratch if you walked by him, sat by him, picked him up the wrong way and he did the same to the min-pin/chihuahua dogs for no apparent reason. He would randomly attack them, nothing to the point of deep wounds, but everyone in this household has scars from him. He even bit my mom on her breast while she was house-sitting for us and I have yet to meet an animal that didn't love my Mom.

Anyhow, after 18 months of him being aggressive he had escalated to the point of repeatedly attacking my dogs' face. After just spending $7000, yes $7000, on liver shunt surgery for one of my dogs, I did not want to have either dog running around blind or worse, without an eye because I did not keep them safe. I was left with a very hard decision to make out of which I had very limited options.

1. Re-home him by giving our already over-populated rescue centers another cat they really didn't have room for, and because of his temperament, a slim chance someone would want him.

2. Surrender him to the local shelter which advised he would likely be put to sleep due to his temperament.

3. De-claw him and keep him in his forever home, the only home he has ever known, with us.

He was declawed this spring, all fours. I did all four paws as he was a hind scratcher. Our vet knew all about Dexter's behavior and when the time finally came, he made me fully aware of how painful it is for them and what the procedure would entail, after-care and risks associated with the procedure. He told me the only reason he was doing it for us was because he knew that we had tried many things to get him to stop the aggressiveness and because he has been our vet for 6 years. The scabs healed in 2 weeks time, but he actually took around 8 weeks to fully heal on the inside. He limped on and off on his front left, but he seems to have adjusted very well. We have a kitty tower that is 5'6'' that he is able to navigate just fine and truth be told, he is actually a NICER cat.

Do I feel bad? You bet, but when I look at my other 4 animals who rely on me to keep them safe, I feel better about the decision I had to make. Would I do it again? If it is a cat like him, yes, but only after exhausting all other options.
 

admin

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Although I am no fan of declawing, I can somewhat understand, thanks for sharing your story Nightspidy, and welcome to Sphynxlair by the way!
 

BlueGirl

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Personaly I cant understand anyone who would get a cat declawed. I consider my pets like other people might consider their children, a child might try to draw on the walls but I wouldnt remove their fingers to stop them.

Loki likes to ocasionally attack my hands but I keep his claws trimmed so it dosnt hurt. Fortunatly he's a very good kitten and isnt destructive but honestly, I dont think he could be with his claws trimmed. Its illegal to have a cat declawed in scotland as its classed as mutilation and I'm so glad that it is.

whats done is done and i'm sure you will continue to be a great mum and help your baby through this.

love xxx
 

xxx_phoenix_xxx

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Personaly I cant understand anyone who would get a cat declawed. I consider my pets like other people might consider their children, a child might try to draw on the walls but I wouldnt remove their fingers to stop them.

Loki likes to ocasionally attack my hands but I keep his claws trimmed so it dosnt hurt. Fortunatly he's a very good kitten and isnt destructive but honestly, I dont think he could be with his claws trimmed. Its illegal to have a cat declawed in scotland as its classed as mutilation and I'm so glad that it is.

whats done is done and i'm sure you will continue to be a great mum and help your baby through this.

love xxx

i totally agree,
everyone should loook at all aspects of owning any pet if you dont like the fact that cats have claws then just dont have one i already said in another thread i think it is cruel you are taking away a part of their body, you wouldnt remove a babies vocal cords beacause you dont like the sound of the crying!!! i just dont understand, i never will.:Cry:

i really hope that this opperation will be banned at some point in the future i see this as animal cruelty, you are no longer allowed to have a skunk decented here in the UK as this is seen as taking away the animals deffence mechanism, i feel a cats claws is theirs and they should have the same right

whats done is done now i just hope that Jack recovers well and lives a long happy life

good luck for the future i'm happy you have now researched and see that it is just horrific
 
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