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Rest Easy My Beautiful Edwin...

EmilyMayer

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Today marks the one year anniversary of when my Edwin earned his wings.

My beloved Edwin was only 6 months old when he passed. He contracted FIP, and was lovingly laid to rest at the Center for Veterinary Specialty Care in Carrolton, Texas on October 24th 2012. He was surrounded by his family, and he passed peacefully in my arms.

There is not one day that goes by that I don't think of him. I fondly remember his brilliantly refined face, broadly set ears and soft, blue eyes... It seems only yesterday I stroked the little patch of hair above his nose for the last time. His forehead was wrinkly and he always had a look of regal concern... Even when he was dubious and playful.

Edwin was my special boy. He patched my heart back together after I lost Monaco, my beloved childhood horse. Monaco also died young.. He was only 6 years old when he was hit by a car, after his gate was left open by a neighborhood teenager. He was laid to rest on the road where he was hit. I was not able to be there with him, to see him off. That haunts me to this day.

On top of this, I was dealing with severe depression, debilitating anxiety and other personal issues.

Monaco's death cleaved me in two. I felt as if I had lost a part of me. I was lost in grief. Drowning in it. Disoriented, confused, angry at myself for not being with him, and feeling responsible for his death. I felt that if I had not entrusted him to those care-givers, he would still be alive to this day. Before his death, I often looked forward to Monaco, grey-faced with age, lovingly toting my children around. Monaco loved children.

Edwin touched my heart with is sweet little paws and slowly eased the pain of Monaco's untimely passing, as well as my depression and anxiety. His silly meow and the pitter-patter of little feet running to greet me when I got home from work each day still echo in my mind...

Sometimes it is difficult to understand why these precious souls have to leave us before their time. My only explanation for this is that they were in my life for a reason. Monaco taught me independence, confidence and self worth. He also taught me to live each day to the absolute fullest, and to love always. He kept me on the straightened arrow and taught me the meaning of responsibility.

When his lessons I had learned, he was called home to await my arrival at the bridge.

Edwin rubbed the pain from my heart with his sweet little head, and dried my tears with his warm little body pressed against mine. He gave me purpose, reason to get out of bed. It's time to feed Edwin, it's time to bathe Edwin, Edwin wants to play. He was my love, my joy, my Sphynx. He climbed into the shower with me, attacked my feet while I was sleeping, and begged for food off my plate.

He healed me. He brought me joy and laughter in the face of a very dark time in my life. When his work was done, he too was called home.

His urn is sitting on my night stand, next to a photo of Monaco. One day, I will find the courage to spread Edwin's ashes. But for now... he is staying with me. Ever watchful... begging for food... interrupting my showers... and always, forever, pressing his warm little body against my heart.

Rest easy, my sweet Eddie. See you at the bridge.

In Loving Memory of Edwin Jarvis
March 2012 - October 2012
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Catzzzmeow

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Got me crying. What a lovely tribute. He is with you every day...stuck in your heart forever.

Patti
 

EmilyMayer

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Oct 23, 2013
Messages
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Thank all of you for your kind words! Today is a rough day for me. I had been just leaking tears all day, but the dam broke just now and I was left bawling my eyes out. I miss him so much, even still. Makes me want to hold Ebe and Sheldon ever closer. Ebe is related to Edwin, they came from the same breeder. They are so different. Ebe is SUCH a diva!
 

Ickushouse

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I am so sorry. I know that the pain is there well after a year has passed. And just a baby. It's just doesn't seem right that such a little light being could pass away from you so soon. To me he is the definition of "angel."
 

EmilyMayer

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I am so sorry. I know that the pain is there well after a year has passed. And just a baby. It's just doesn't seem right that such a little light being could pass away from you so soon. To me he is the definition of "angel."

that brought a tear to my eye... thank you everyone for your kind words and support!
 

kristininn

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What you wrote is beautiful and a wonderful tribute to Edwin and Monaco. I'm glad your heart is healing.
 

Scarfie

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Oct 23, 2013
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Some people might say "It's just a pet." I am sure we are all well aware that "just pets" are more like family. In fact, they are family. We pour all the love we can give into them and they show it right back. It's hard to let go of a beloved family member after their passing. You'll always have your wonderful memories. Soldier on, the healing process will only get better.
 

EmilyMayer

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They are my children. Instead of getting mad, I pity those who think they are "just pets". The fact that they have never fully opened their hearts to the kind of love that these animals can give... It's a shame.

I am feeling a little better this morning. Little "Etwin" as I called him, has been on my mind all night and this morning. I miss him so much. Thank you all for the support and kind words<3
 

andreanar

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I am so sorry for your losses. What a beautiful memorial you wrote, brought a tear to my eye. I hate hearing of babies dying of FIP. I hate FIP and wish it could just go away.
It sounds like you have had 2 great great loves!
 

MyJezebel

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I got very teary eyed reading your post. Not only because of the sadness you so poignantly expressed about losing Edwin and Monaco, but because of the wonderful life lessons that they taught you too. It really is a lovely tribute to your beloved pets. Rest in peace Edwin and Monaco.
 

susi794

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Your loving words touched my heart deeply. It is obvious that your sweet animal kids were deeply loved....and I believe you will see them both again someday across the Bridge. I think Edwin feels your love even now and he remembers....may you have peace in your heart as you also remember him.
Much love,
Susi and the gang
 

EmilyMayer

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Your loving words touched my heart deeply. It is obvious that your sweet animal kids were deeply loved....and I believe you will see them both again someday across the Bridge. I think Edwin feels your love even now and he remembers....may you have peace in your heart as you also remember him.
Much love,
Susi and the gang

You made me cry! Thank you for your kind words.
 

Inflamed

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I'm so sorry your animal loves had to leave you too early. Your memorial is beautiful and so are the memories you will have in your heart forever.
RIP Edwin & Monaco, you are missed.
 
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