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- Sep 30, 2010
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Rupert is terminal and was given one month to live today. He likely has FIP and the vet has discovered that he has a heart murmur, not that that really matters at this point. I took him to the vet today because I thought he was constipated, but it turns out that his distended abdomen is from fluid accumulation. The vet aspirated it and is sending it off to the lab along with some blood work. The x-rays are terrible. He has so much fluid in his belly that his internal organs below his rib cage are not visible. His heart is enlarged and is in contact with his sternum. He is getting an ultrasound on monday to take a closer look at his heart and abdomen. It's just so terrible, words can't describe how heart wrenching this is. The vet had to use an 18 gage needle, 2 separate aspiration spots, to obtain a sample and drain some of the fluid it was so thick. His belly was leaking so badly from the pressure it wouldn't stop so they bandaged it up. His belly looks bigger than when I took him to the vet's this morning and seems to have filled up quite a bit in his pelvic area. I don't think he is going to make it a month, I think maybe 2 weeks is more humane.
You can see that no internal organs are visible from below the rib cage b/c of all of the fluid that has accumulated in his abdominal cavity. Also, you can't see it here, but his heart is enlarged and is in contact with his sternum. The vet says there is a small chance that it could be congestive heart failure or either a tumor of sorts, but along with his other symptoms, the vet is 95% sure he has Feline Infectious Peritonitis. As most of you may already know, it is fatal and he only has about a month or so to live. It explains a lot of things though - the problems with his bowels that we've had since the first month he came home, to the not gaining very much weight, to him being more of a snuggler and not playing with the others so much, not meowing or running around with the others. It's not that he was more of a snuggler, a quiet guy or even low key, he's just been sick, so sick that he doesn't have the breath to meow or be able to run around.
You can see with these two pics how distended he is. It honestly looks like there is a grapefruit in his stomach.
I can't even begin to tell you how devastated I am over this, my heart is broken, broken to pieces. Rupert is very special to me, he saved my life. When I was diagnosed with depression for the first time in my life, it was pretty bad. I knew I was going to get to the point where I just didn't want to exist anymore. Then I had the idea of getting a sphynx kitten and we went and looked at them. He chose me. He came right up to me, swatted my hand and climbed all over me. When we were leaving, he followed me down the stairs, he was the only one who came down the stairs to see me off. When I found out we shared the same birthday, I knew it was meant to be, this must be a sign. Rupert gave me a reason to get out of bed every day. I knew he depended on me and I was determined not to let him down. When my depression was at it's worst and I was focused on dying and dying quickly, I just looked at him and decided I was going to die but it wasn't going to be today - he was my reason to continue on everyday. Now, it is he who is dying and there isn't a damned thing I can do about it. I have to watch him slip away. As his belly fills with the fluids, the pressure on his diaphragm will increase and breathing will get harder and harder; the vet explained it as akin to drowning. I was really hoping he would pass peacefully in the night, but I doubt that will happen. I suspect we will have to put him to sleep as his breathing will become more and more "gaspy" as he fights for air, and I don't want him to have to go through that fear and pain. It is just such an unfair decision to have to make. I don't know if I can even do it, just typing about it now is very, very upsetting for me.
Oh, and to top it all off, Orion has a heart murmur as well. He isn't showing any clinical signs as of yet, so we are going to get him scanned once he is a year old, which isn't too far off. Rupert on the other hand won't make it to his first birthday.
You can see that no internal organs are visible from below the rib cage b/c of all of the fluid that has accumulated in his abdominal cavity. Also, you can't see it here, but his heart is enlarged and is in contact with his sternum. The vet says there is a small chance that it could be congestive heart failure or either a tumor of sorts, but along with his other symptoms, the vet is 95% sure he has Feline Infectious Peritonitis. As most of you may already know, it is fatal and he only has about a month or so to live. It explains a lot of things though - the problems with his bowels that we've had since the first month he came home, to the not gaining very much weight, to him being more of a snuggler and not playing with the others so much, not meowing or running around with the others. It's not that he was more of a snuggler, a quiet guy or even low key, he's just been sick, so sick that he doesn't have the breath to meow or be able to run around.
You can see with these two pics how distended he is. It honestly looks like there is a grapefruit in his stomach.
I can't even begin to tell you how devastated I am over this, my heart is broken, broken to pieces. Rupert is very special to me, he saved my life. When I was diagnosed with depression for the first time in my life, it was pretty bad. I knew I was going to get to the point where I just didn't want to exist anymore. Then I had the idea of getting a sphynx kitten and we went and looked at them. He chose me. He came right up to me, swatted my hand and climbed all over me. When we were leaving, he followed me down the stairs, he was the only one who came down the stairs to see me off. When I found out we shared the same birthday, I knew it was meant to be, this must be a sign. Rupert gave me a reason to get out of bed every day. I knew he depended on me and I was determined not to let him down. When my depression was at it's worst and I was focused on dying and dying quickly, I just looked at him and decided I was going to die but it wasn't going to be today - he was my reason to continue on everyday. Now, it is he who is dying and there isn't a damned thing I can do about it. I have to watch him slip away. As his belly fills with the fluids, the pressure on his diaphragm will increase and breathing will get harder and harder; the vet explained it as akin to drowning. I was really hoping he would pass peacefully in the night, but I doubt that will happen. I suspect we will have to put him to sleep as his breathing will become more and more "gaspy" as he fights for air, and I don't want him to have to go through that fear and pain. It is just such an unfair decision to have to make. I don't know if I can even do it, just typing about it now is very, very upsetting for me.
Oh, and to top it all off, Orion has a heart murmur as well. He isn't showing any clinical signs as of yet, so we are going to get him scanned once he is a year old, which isn't too far off. Rupert on the other hand won't make it to his first birthday.
FIP is horrible, horrible...
