Cat introduction gone badly wrong

[Randomesque]

Hi everyone,

I have a seven month old grey Sphynx called Merlin who has been with me since May of this year, and has been an absolute joy since I got him. He is extremely vocal and wants to play constantly. I play with him as much as I can, but as I'm working from home, he often isn't happy if I'm working when he thinks it should be playtime. I foolishly thought getting him a little buddy might help keep him occupied when I need to work. Merlin was neutered last month and once he was healed up I thought he was ready for company. Enter Monkey, 3 month old Sphynx kitten who I picked up about a fortnight ago. I've been trying hard to follow cat introduction protocol, separate rooms, toys, litter tray, feeding on either side of the door, site swapping regularly, feliway plugins all over the place. Merlin will sit by the door wherever Monkey is and loudly cry relentlessly for hours, to the point where it is impossible to get anything done. Both cats are ready to sprint off whenever I open a door the slightest crack, so they have managed to get into the same room a few times. The result is always the same, Merlin immediately pounces on Monkey, pins him down and bites his neck and then they start fighting and sprinting around the room chasing each other. I've tried to distract Merlin with food and toys, but he has a laser focus on Monkey wherever he is at any time, even if they're in separate rooms. Merlin has now stopped showing me any affection and although he will still approach me for food and play, won't let me touch him or purr when I am in the room. He is showing my housemate affection so he isn't totally miserable. Monkey is very sweet but he also cries being stuck in a room on his own when I am not there. It has only been a fortnight but I am completely exhausted and feel that I have made a mistake and now both cats are miserable. Am I being overly sensitive, or is this a sign that the cats are simply incompatible? Keeping them separate is a real slog, but if I had some sense of how long it needs to happen it might feel more manageable - but I know I'm on cat time not human time! Any advice at all gladly received, i'm desperate not to re-home either of them but increasingly feel like it might be the only option.

Thanks all
Chantal

 

[Yoda mom]

@Randomesque , hugs n positive vibes. I am always jealous when I see kitties hit it off right away. I have 4 nakids and a bengal. I did extremely slow intros, kitty safe room set up like you have. My Toby was a huge brat. Now he is the one who is soo nurturing . I just had to go at their comfort level , hissing etc normal while they establish pecking order. I separated if were getting too rough. I also rotated free roaming. I would put resident cat in newbies room and vice versa. I cross scented towels and put by each others food dishes. Tall cat tree in main area where Toby would sit on top and hiss moan while newbie walked around. I used 1 pole toys for interaction in neutral turf area. did short interactions based on comfort level it all came together. they are 8 thru 11 yrs old now and get along amazing. I will add I personally found males to be very loving towards each other once they have settled in. Yes, it was a rough week plus but got better each day. hang in there. don't hesitate to ask questions. btw, the feli away plugs made my Toby worse! he would go over and growl and hiss at the diffusers so I took them out.
I did use a baby gate zip tied full open and held in doorway with my foot while I supervised sneek peeks and tossing treats on each side. had to watch Toby from climbing over but it helped with intros here. time patience love.

 

[Cleopatra Beers]

Your older cat may still be having some hormonal issues. He may settle down in the next weeks, as the hormones leave his body.

 

[SkippysMama]

Ok, I am so sorry you are struggling with your kitten introduction but very happy you have posted this question! We are in an almost identical situation with our 14 month old Skippy (male) and new 3 month old kitten Fiona (female). We isolated her for two weeks in my son's room and she is itching to leave, and Skippy is OBSESSED with her, mooning outside her door etc. We've done the scent swapping, feeding on opposite sides of the door, etc. but every time we get them together it invariably ends with a fight. Basically Skippy chases her around trying to lick her but she runs away and he gets frustrated and pins her down with some nipping/licking and she gets angry and fights back, and it devolves from there. It is a bit better if we can keep them both super engaged with play, but eventually goes to the fight. We are worried about leaving them to work it out because she is so much littler than he is and don't want her to get hurt and/or end up terrified of him. I'm not sure if we are being appropriately careful or overly concerned. Everything I have read tells me this may take some time but how best to help them along? I'm sorry I don't have more advice to provide but am super interested in the other replies here. Pictures included as penance - Skippy is the dark one and Fiona is the torty elf.

 

[Sheldon13]

You both might consider putting a fitted shirt on the more aggressive cat. You cannot leave them alone with clothes on of course. But it may calm them and allow for more peaceful introductions.


Love and Sphynx ~ It’s all you need

 

[bennybad]

Be patient it will take time. Female is the black she is 10 months and the male is 18 months. Took awhile but suddenly they are best friens and the worst enemies. If you have children that are years apart. They love each other one minute and hate each other the next. But in time they are best friends 90% of the time and the balance is some epic rumbles. I honestly think they like the rumbles and as long as theres no blood no foul rule. Just joking
All i can say is there is nothing like 2 of these special creatures together

 

[bennybad]

The times that make the work worth it

 

[Cleopatra Beers]

Be patient it will take time. Female is the black she is 10 months and the male is 18 months. Took awhile but suddenly they are best friens and the worst enemies. If you have children that are years apart. They love each other one minute and hate each other the next. But in time they are best friends 90% of the time and the balance is some epic rumbles. I honestly think they like the rumbles and as long as theres no blood no foul rule. Just joking
All i can say is there is nothing like 2 of these special creatures together

You are so right! Cleo and Marcus seldom sleep together, but usually they rub along fairly well—as long as Marcus leaves Cleo’s toys alone. But there are times that Marcus will get in Cleo’s face, and the “fight” is on. Usually it’s a lot of running, some growling and hissing, and sometimes the claws come out. But in a few minutes, they each go their own way, and peace reigns again.